Monthly Archives: November 2013

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How to find the courage to speak your truth – and connect with the freedom this brings

daisies in purpleI was very blessed at the weekend to have a stand at the Mind Body Spirit Exhibition in Brighton. How it unfolded was magical, and what happened blew me away.

I went along to share a passion of mine. Even though I developed it four years ago, it was the first time I had actually really stepped up into talking about it. It is called The Spiritual Teacher’s Accreditation Program, and it is about empowering a new generation of teachers and leaders to connect with their message, learn about how to deliver it in ways that make a difference, and also connect with the skills, wisdom and experience to deliver and present awesome heart-centred courses, workshops and tele seminars.

I love what I do, and feel so grateful to be doing what I love. It has amazed me though to look back and realise that it has taken me four years to get to the point where I am finally ready to step up and share it with others. Every time I have delivered it, the feedback has been amazing – but yet I don’t think I was ready to take it out into the world properly until now. Reflecting on this has made me realise something very powerful about courage and speaking our Truths – and how much of a difference we can make to the lives of others when we do.

We all have something that we believe in – that we are passionate about. How often, even when working on something we love with all our hearts, do we get a still small voice saying things like:

“You can’t do that! Don’t be ridiculous!”

“Who do you think you are?”

“What will people do or say if you speak your Truth?”

We often hear those thoughts because our ego is trying to keep us safe. I happen to believe that, as cutting edge science is now suggesting, that we exist not just in this lifetime, but in an infinite number of lifetimes. In some of those, we are likely to have been burned at the stake for being a witch, or our families may have been harmed because of us standing in our Truth or power. Or we may have made vows or promises to not speak in order to keep ourselves or our loved ones safe – or that we will “pretend” to be a success but not actually ever make it. We may have promised to keep ourselves small to keep ourselves and our loved ones safe.

Cutting edge science is also starting to show how we are all connected – and have, as Carl Jung described over 100 years ago – a collective consciousness, or psyche. So our fears of speaking up, of what might happen if we do, may not just be our own, but might also be a combination of everyone else’s fears of what may happen.

Some of my experience of working with public speakers has been to help them release them from these vows and promises and limiting thoughts. You can do this simply just by setting your intention that you are released from them in any place in time or space where they may exist.

However there is something bigger here that being at Mind Body Spirit reminded me of.

Sometimes you just have to trust and have the courage to stand in your truth, no matter what happens. There is nothing stronger than your truth and no-one can take it from you unless you allow them to. Your truth is your connection to your beliefs, your world view, how you make decisions, your own empowerment – and your love. For to have courage, you have to act with your whole heart, which means you must truly, deeply, completely love yourself and others.

Courage is the greatest gift that you can share. And here’s why this is important.

We live during amazing, remarkable times of transition on our planet. As I look around, more efforts are made to try to prevent us from expressing our freedoms to live with a blue sky, natural weather patterns, healthy food free of GMOs or pesticides, access to pure water and free energy. We KNOW there is another way. Where corporations and money are not in power, but love and freedom and true democracy underpin every aspect of life. This is what Marianne Williamson – a woman of huge courage and a truth seeker – is now doing as she runs for US Congress, with support from not just within the US but from people around the world. Russell Brand did so brilliantly with Jeremy Paxman on Newsnight – and the thing that amazed me was seeing Paxman’s reaction. Paxman – a man notorious for his playing “devil’s advocate” gave Brand space to talk AND agreed with his thinking on revolution and that the current political system is not acceptable.

I know of people who are living in places where their grass and trees are being covered with an orange dust, as planes fly over daily, an orange dust that is making people ill. Some are developing chemical burns on their faces – but are too scared to talk about what they think it is, in case they lose friends, are abandoned by their families – or worse, targeted by those dumping the chemicals.

It is time everyone. It is time to stand up and share your truth. Our planet, our loved ones, and our hearts need us to do so. We get scared about what may happen if we share our truth – and this fear keeps us imprisoned. You have the key to let yourself out. The key is believing that you matter, that you count, that you will be loved always no matter what – even if that love comes in another way. And you need to know that you are safe always. Let go of your fears. If your friends leave you, then they were never friends. You will always find people who love you.

Easy for me to say, you might think! But I know this to be true from my own journey to standing in my Truth. Let me share for a brief moment the power of stepping into your Truth – and how it can free others to be in theirs.

Magic Experience #1 – extracted from The 8 Magic Keys to a Wonderful Life

“You WHA’?!” exclaimed a London taxi driver jovially to me when I first told someone what I do – from a place of empowerment, rather than apology. The conversation went like this.

“So wha’ d’you do?” he asked, as we drove off towards my destination. I replied in exactly the same tone that I would have used had I said “I am a teacher” or “I am a lawyer” or “I am a doctor”.

“I teach people about angels.” This was where his “You WHA’?!” came in. “Oh my God, I have been doin’ this for twen’ie years, and I’ve never ‘ad someone like you in the back ‘o me cab!”.

I smiled. He didn’t stop there.

“Michael. Is there one called Michael? That’s my name…..can ‘e ‘elp me d’you reckon?”.

We had a wonderful conversation about how he could speak to the angels, and what they can help with and not, based on what I understood and taught at that time.

I had been on a long journey to get to the point where I could say this comfortably.

“Do you think you need to see someone…..you know, like a professional?” said one friend, through tears at his concerns for me when I told him what I had started to connect with, once my awakening got too great to ignore. Other friends embraced it fully. “We all knew you were a bit different”, said others, lovingly.

For a long time, when people asked me what I did, at weddings, or parties, I would begin with an apology.

“I do this thing that you might find a bit strange……and I don’t ask you to believe what I believe, but…….”. I would begin and then watch as others would back away, pretty much with their hands up in surrender, clearly concerned at the scared person they were speaking to. They felt my fear of rejection, and my inability to be in my power.

So “coming out”, as it were – being in my Truth – was a very scary thing to do. Wonderful things started to happen once I did though.

Friends would come up to me at parties and social events, and then friends-of-friends, and kind of surreptitiously corner me. They would start to tell me about their “strange” experiences – experiences where they had seen a spirit, or had a prophetic dream and ask “I hope it is OK to ask you about this? I can’t tell anyone else – they’d think I’m mad.” I helped others feel safe with the experiences they had had, and I would give them answers to explain situations that they were struggling to understand.

Speaking your Truth, as Marianne Williamson’s piece of writing suggests, gives other people permission to do the same.

I had a wonderful moment of this at a business conference. I was talking about consciousness at the event. One of the delegates, a very professional man in a suit, came up to me with a piece of paper, and told me he had a “message” for me. I looked at him, confused. He said “I get them, I always have. This one is for you.” It turned out that my mother had woken him up in the early hours of the morning with a message that she wanted to give me. I don’t believe he had told anyone in his workplace about his “gift”. He only did so with me because I had been open that I have spiritual experiences. His accuracy – given that he didn’t know my circumstances – was amazing.

Magic Experience #2 – also extracted from The 8 Magic Keys to a Wonderful Life

There is also another aspect to Speaking your Truth that really matters.

I met a truly inspirational teacher, Simon Sutton, through a friend some years ago. Simon created Simon on the Sofa, inviting people from all walks of life to share their Truths and insights with him, on a sofa. His simple belief is that we all have something to share no matter who we are.

So in this meeting, we were discussing the possibility of doing some work together. At the end of our discussion, he turned to me in front of a table of onlookers and looked me straight in the eyes.

“There is one thing I ask of everyone that I connect with”, he began. “If ever there is something that comes up for you, in our working together – a moment where you have a question, or feel uncomfortable in any way or have an issue with anything happening in our journey together, I ask that you come to me about it. There is no point going to anyone else about it because they can’t help you with it. I can. Is that OK?”

The intensity of his sincerity was quite unnerving – and a bit uncomfortable. Could I really do that? Could I really be in my integrity and speak my truth to him no matter what? In that moment, I was inspired to do so, and have always been grateful to him for sharing with me an empowering and respectful way of being in dialogue and relationship with others.

If we can commit to this level of transparency, we can also then learn to really be in our Truth with others – say yes when we feel our Truth to be a yes, and saying no when out Truth is a no.

Again it comes down to courage – and loving yourself enough to do it.

speak-truth-gandhiWe are all here to be part of the movement to transform the world from what it is to what we know it can be – a place of love, governed and lived in and shared with love. Here’s a few tips to how you can do so:

    • Learn to speak your Truth to your loved ones – often this is a great challenge. We want their love and approval and companionship, and so often we can put their needs, or our need not to experience rejection first. True love creates space for everyone to be happy. That means you can do what resonates as the best thing for you to do on a day-to-day basis, and they will still love you. If they react that is because it is their stuff, their insecurities. Remind the person that you love them, and help them learn to listen to their truth and their needs too by doing it yourself!
    • When you share your Truth – especially if it might be difficult for someone else to receive – introduce it by saying “Please check what resonates (feels true) to you”. Or you can say “in my experience…..” or “As I understand it…..”. If you just say “It’s this!” or “I know what it is”, people get defensive, our egos don’t like being told what we believe is wrong!
    • If you find some people don’t like it – and they won’t – reflect on whether you have delivered in the most loving way you could. If you did, then that is the best you could do. Love yourself for being in your Truth at all times.
    • Respect other’s right to believe differently. It’s OK. It doesn’t mean there’s no point in sharing – actually, once you have said something, if it is something that is truth, their subconscious will hear it, and so it will come to their consciousness every now and then. Eventually when it is time, they will realise you were speaking a truth.
    • Learn to feel comfortable with difference (including of belief or opinion). Then when you share, you only need to say it once, and let go of how another person might react.
    • If you speak emotionally – because you need others to believe, accept or support you – you are more likely to end up in an argument, or feeling rejected. Take the emotion out, present fact, and if someone believes differently, just finish with an “OK”. And move on.
    • Remember that this life is an illusion. You are here to have an experience, and that means that you are already free. 

I learned this doing the first UK “meditation flash mob”. A short video below of what happened is one of the most powerful experiences learning about truth, courage and freedom I have had.

Enjoy and please do share if it resonates!

Love Danica x

Copyright © Danica Apolline 2013

 

Listen in to the FREE teleseminar I held on Wednesday 6th November called “20 Secret Tips to Being an AWESOME Heart-centred Spiritual Teacher”. Find out more information here!